My life

Have been trying to settle down and trying to keep myself busy and I have succeeded in making myself feel fucking busy. Now that I have pretty much settled down, I will need to execute what I have reflected and decided to do when I was in Europe.

Yeah bet you must be thinking that I was in Europe playing around blablabla right? NO. I wasn't just playing. Not that I am saying that I didn't play. But as usual, work hard, play hard, sleep hard. Maybe play harder, work lesser haha. But travelling around does help me reflect on what had happened in the past and think through everything.

I met many many kinds of people abroad and they did broaden my view. When I told Sashka that when I was at budapest, I had a good chat with an ex-drug dealer and that guy told me that he was very happy to chat with me. He said that he haven't had a good laugh for a very long time. Am I that funny? I thought he was more entertaining. He could do some stick stunts without using his hands to touch the stick. It's complicated to describe. No penis involve. It was like using his hands, to control 2 sticks to control 1 stick. Sashka told me that I was daring and I am the type of person who talks to people and doesn't care about a person's social status. I don't know. I don't talk to beggars and people who free rides on social welfare systems... or any free riders. lol. That guy just look like a normal teenage boy. But after hearing his life story, I think he is more daring than me. And hearing what he did for his ex girlfriend, I thought how blind love can make one become. :/ I hope the next time I fall in love, I wouldn't be that blind.

I met a few entrepreneurs like club owners, non-profit organization chairman, fashion shop lady boss. They are really inspiring. Hearing their stories motivates me somehow. I can't really describe. I thought it was a good idea to motivate myself before school starts. I guess it helped alot. Because now I am back on "workaholic" mode. You know, the "Step out of the comfort zone" mode. Whatever it is, I hope I will change for a better.

Moving forward, I initially planned to go back to europe this year end to celebrate slovakian xmas with sashka and then visit other europe countries like the netherlands. But I guess maybe not this time because sashka is going on an exchange in sweden and if she goes back to slovakia, it will only be for a while. I want to meet my dorm mates again. But this year end, I am going ASIA. *wow how exciting* you know why? After learning Japanese for almost 5 years, I am finally going to JAPAN!!! Wee! and before going to Japan, probably Bali. 2 places which I have never been to!

Okay i am too tired to talk about my career choice and so on and so forth. So I will talk about it again.

P.S. I am not daring. I am just being open-minded. I am not being nice. I just don't want to waste my time and energy on being angry. Trust me, I can't be angry for long. I am sorry if I made cold remarks or/and was too direct that it hurt anyone. It's just my opinion... I don't want to appear too fake and I am not good with rephrasing my words such that it doesn't hurt. I am learning to buffer my "cold" remarks. Hope you will forgive me. And try to understand that I was brought up in such a family where people talk really direct plus with louder voice. I don't know which part of my life did I developed the "cold" attitude though. Even my parents thought that I was pretty cold hearted when I made some remarks a few years ago. I didn't know that I was talking in a "cold" and direct way until people tell me that because I thought it was normal.

TBC....